Is Al-Anon for you?
The following questions may help you to decide whether Al-Anon is for you:
- Do you have a parent, close friend or relative whose drinking upsets you?
- Do you cover up your real feelings by pretending you don't care?
- Does it seem like every holiday is spoiled because of drinking?
- Do you tell lies to cover up for someone else's drinking or for what's happening in your home?
- Do you stay out of the house as much as possible because you hate it there?
- Are you afraid to upset someone for fear it will set off a drinking bout?
- Do you feel nobody really loves you or cares what happens to you?
- Are you afraid or embarrassed to bring your friends home?
- Do you think the drinker's behaviour is caused by you, other members of your family, friends, or rotten breaks in life?
- Do you believe no one could possibly understand how you feel?
- Do you have money problems because of some else's drinking?
- Are meal times frequently delayed because of the drinker?
- Have you considered calling the police because of someone's drinking behaviour?
- Have you refused to attend social occasions out of fear or anxiety?
- Do you think that if the drinker stopped drinking, all your problems would be solved?
If you have answered YES to some of these questions, joining an Al-Anon group may help you. Contact us now or find a meeting.
I found Al-Anon three years ago through a friend. I called Al-Anon in despair about my then boyfriend's drinking. I was finding it increasingly difficult to function, thinking if only he would stop drinking, everything would be ok.
I did as suggested and started going to meetings - listening, talking and making phone calls. Early on, I felt uncomfortable and fearful in meetings, but I related to so much that people said.
Soon I realised that the disease of addiction ran through my family but now I no longer felt alone in my pain, which was a life saver. Al-Anon has helped me to challenge the old patterns of thinking and behaving that so subtly emerge as a result of this disease. Negativity, fear, isolation, criticism, confusion, people-pleasing, secrets - these are some of the words that I associate with alcoholism.